A Good Way to Repel Mosquitoes

A few years ago I went camping against my will. The humidity was high and the mosquitoes were thick. We did twice the amount of work we do when we are at home. I'm still mad. We took Mike's mom and dad because we figured it would be like returning to their childhood before the inventions of modern air conditioning, electricity, and the wheel. We are thoughtful like that.

We took them and our children eight hours away to a crystal clear lake on the border of Canada. We stayed in a contraption called a yert. Yes, a yert. A yert is a permanent circular structure made out of tent material. Inside were five bunk beds and a table. No bathroom. No kitchen. No couch. No microwave. No happiness. It was, however, apparently in the middle of a mosquito farm.

We fished by day and played cards by night. All in all, we were blessed with gorgeous weather, stunning scenery, special moments together, and lots of family bonding. Except for that one moment that I still get criticized for when Mike's mom tried to climb into her top bunk in her nightgown and couldn't quite make it and got her arm stuck between the mattress and the bed frame while suspended helplessly in the air violently kicking her feet in a mad attempt to gain momentum, and, instead of helping, I just video taped her. I still think I made the right call on that.

One morning, Josiah was rolling out of bed when his grandpa told him, "Hey, Josiah, do you know that you toot in your sleep?" He had to say toot because he is a g rated grandpa.

"Are you sure, Grandpa?" Josiah asked skeptically.
"I'm sure," Grandpa confirmed. "You toot all night long and really loud too."
"I can't believe that. I fart in my sleep?" Josiah is not g rated.
"It is true."
"That is so AWESOME!! I have to go tell Drake!"

To Grandpa's surprise, Josiah ran out of the yert and was heard explaining the exciting news to Drake.

"Wait," Drake responded. "Do you mean you fart really loud all night long?"
"Yep!"
"You are so lucky!"

I wasn't sure that this outcome had been what Grandpa had originally intended and was wondering if I should intervene when Emery looked up at me and said in her baby voice, "Mom, the ways of boys are strange. Don't try to mess with it; it just makes it worse."